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The Frame Audit

Choose one setting: a team, a family role, a community, or an online space. Answer from what you observe.

The five questions come from I Don’t Remember Choosing This. The supporting prompts below are adapted for this worksheet.

What is rewarded?
Notice what earns approval, attention, status, or opportunity. What do people learn to do more of?
What is punished?
Look for what brings criticism, exclusion, or a quieter form of disapproval. What do people learn to avoid?
What is invisible but decisive?
Consider the unwritten expectations, relationships, and rules that shape the outcome.
What is capped?
Where does more effort stop producing more of what matters to you?
What compounds?
What builds over time: trust, skill, ownership, options—or a pattern you would rather change?

One next move

What becomes visible when you look at all five answers? Choose one small change to test, then notice what happens.